friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
