My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
that's an acceptable place to lick
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Randomize
