i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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