if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
