we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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