i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
I did not marry a roomba.
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