its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
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