If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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