i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
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Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
If I die, sorry about rent.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
the raccoons are back...
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