doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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