What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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