if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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