My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
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