Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Randomize
