How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize