im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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