don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
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He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
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Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
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