Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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