i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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