He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
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just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
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Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.