dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Randomize
