So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
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You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
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We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
So vagazzling was a success
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
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