apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Randomize
