a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
