Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
