there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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