He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Shame - the story of my life.
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