did you get engaged???
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
i was born a porn star she said
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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