I wish I could teleport
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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