I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Randomize