kristin has been a bad kristin
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
