just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
