There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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