i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Alive.
So much puke
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
