No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
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