What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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