Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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