i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
