Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize