Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize