He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
