How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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