Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
