That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Randomize