sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
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she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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