But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Randomize
