C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize