Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
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