If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Randomize
