Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
